How to give feedback that will actually stick

Feedback doesn’t have to feel like walking on eggshells

Author

Kelly Vaughn
January 21, 2025 • Reading Time: 4 minutes

Today’s newsletter is a small excerpt of what you can expect from my brand new self-paced Management Fundamentals course, launching TODAY for $349! This course is great for ICs and managers alike and will teach you the fundamental skills you need to be a successful leader in any organization.

Giving feedback is one of the most powerful tools in your leadership toolbox—but it’s easy to get wrong. Too vague, and it’s not actionable. Too personal, and it damages trust.

That’s where the STAR framework comes in. No, not that STAR framework. (Yes, there’s another one you’re likely thinking of: Situation/Task/Action/Result - often used for interviewing.)

This STAR framework helps you deliver feedback that’s Specific, Timely, About the action/behavior (not the person), and Relevant using examples.

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Here’s how it works:

  1. Specific: Focus on the details. Instead of “You’re always late on deadlines,” try, “The last two reports you submitted were 2–3 days late, which delayed the team’s progress.”

  2. Timely: Don’t wait weeks or months to bring it up. Feedback is most effective when it’s still fresh.

  3. Action/Behavior: Focus on what the person did, not who they are. Avoid labels like “lazy” or “disorganized.”

  4. Relevant: Explain why it matters. How does their behavior impact the team or the project?

Here’s an example:

Bad feedback: “You’re too quiet in meetings. You need to speak up more.”

Reframed using the STAR framework: “In yesterday’s meeting, you had great ideas in our follow-up 1:1, but you didn’t share them during the discussion. Sharing those ideas earlier would help the team make faster decisions.”

See the difference? STAR feedback is clear, actionable, and builds trust. And it doesn’t take much extra work!

Want to work with me? Here are 3 ways I can help you:

  1. Upgrade to a paid membership: You’ll get VIP access to monthly deep dives on newsletter topics shared on Tuesdays, as well as the archive of all free Tuesday posts. This includes scripts and templates you can put to use immediately.

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